The History of Gin
or
A Fox's Tail
Is Life Existential? You Decide.
by ' Colorado ' Gumi
...I n s p i r e d By T r u e E v e n t s...
Chapter 8
Jules et Gin
Partie Un
There is nothing remarkable about the so-called "Imaginary Friends" of childhood. Sprogs, Ankle-Biters and Rugrats of all stripes and persuasions routinely conjure these figments from the collective subconscious for whatever reasons. No indeed, there's nothing at all remarkable about imaginary friends. And even if there were something remarkable about imaginary friends, it's impossible to assess the damage such apparitions may do to the afflicted Sprog because by the time the "friend" appears no one can reconstruct what the Brat's normal life would've been had it never been imagined... Once conjured, the damage has been done. Yes, it definitely may be as much as 65% certain there is no harm done by such flights of fancy, assuming of course that it is a fancy and not some Pan-Dimensional Being, Super-Intelligent Space Alien or outright Demon that is trying to hijack the Rugrat's psyche for it's own nefarious agenda, like in that Star Trek episode (starring William Shatner as Captain Kirk).
However, Ginny's imaginary friend WAS remarkable because she was 21 and in second year at Cornell Law when Jules first made his appearance.
[Author's Note: Truthfully, it's unfair to juxtapose the first silly discussion of the proverbial "Imaginary Friend" of childhood with the second unrelated discussion of an identity Ginny allegedly made up. The first discussion segues expertly into the second as if they are related, and by this association, the absurd flavor of the first permeates the second, adding to it an unwarranted taste of the ridiculous. Probably there is a scholarly lawyer term that I don't know for such tricks of rhetoric.
In fact, the entire exercise is a skillful ploy to be funny. Probably there is also a scholarly comedic term that I don't know for such tricks of humor.
Yet cleverly twisting or better still, completely fabricating the truth is my way. And like the guy said in that 'Dangerous Liaisons' movie, "It's beyond my control" anyways...]
Jules grew from a discussion Ginny had with a particular friend (who's identity is irrelevant, especially if it was me) concerning that person's desire to know Gin's father's opinion of certain Wall Street investments. Everyone knows that Mr. Mullins, though staunchly recalcitrant, is a Certified Genius with the Midas touch -- like Lex Luthor.
As anyone with casual knowledge of Sherlock Holmes, M. Poirot or Nero Wolfe knows, one must be circumspect when dealing with geniuses because they quickly deduce everything from one or two facts and wind up knowing all your business, even what happened in the elevator. (I know this for a fact, as I do it all the time myself.) So Gin was wary of just coming out and asking her father's opinion on anything since one could fill a large Japanese trawler with tuna using all the cans of worms it opens. Besides what's the point of studying law if one's going to approach things in a simple, direct and open manner; that's the way engineers do things.
Sitting there with her friend, mulling over the request, Gin figured she could start by asking her father if he thinks a person... without naming names... should put money into Google now that it's pulled back some or if it's better to wait because it's going to drop even more. Then under the inevitable pressure of his interrogation -- at such times being prepared and not blinking are paramount -- she could drop a name. . .Jules. . . which just popped into her head, as random names often do.
Working through the scenarios she figured the next time her dad called -- for whatever, maybe to ask if she had the 24K service done on the Beemer -- she'ld open with something along the lines of, "No I didn't get it serviced because the dudes at the dealership undress me with their eyes. By the way. . .Google has dropped quite a bit lately. Do you think it will recover and if so, is this the low or will it drop more before jumping back up."
He might say, "Well, with the skimpy skirts you wear I can't imagine it takes much for anyone's eyes to remove them. But surely you aren't interested in investments. . .why are you asking?"
Artfully controlling the conversation, she replies "Ah well... Yes I am interested but actually I was going by Starbuck's where I ran into my friend..."
He interjects, "OHMYGOD WITH YOUR CAR!!"
She continues, "NO, NOT with my car! ...My old friend, Jules, an exchange student from France that I know (whom, for those already lost in the intrigue, she made up), and he was talking about Google and it got me interested, what with it's spectacular rise and fall. And anyways, I can't just be a pretty face and sweet smile my whole life (...as her adoring father, he ignores rather than concedes this point)."
Undoubtedly he would respond, "Is this Jules a boyfriend?"
And she shrewdly moves her next chess piece, "Oh No... no way. He's homosexual." In his mind this changes Jules from being a person that he might actually have to meet someday to a theoretical entity. . . the kind of young dude a daughter's father can really like.
At this point Ginny assured her friend she just needs to sit back and take copious notes as her dad waxes expansively on his profound understanding of Google's potentiality.
Then she would add, "And you know, the girl behind the counter at Starbuck's, who by the way must weigh at least 300 lbs., was talking about the New York Stock Exchange IPO... Is that something to jump on now? Because when she mentioned it, a guy behind the counter, I think his name was Seth, said that the Chicago Mercantile Exchange went public a few years ago and it's stock has soared 3 or 4 times in the last year or two."
And again he would expound, up and down, about these investments. In closing he might even let slip the prospective release date for "Doom 4." It was a most cunning plan -- a piece of cake or as Brits say, Robert's your father's brother. Ginny beamed in all her sagacious splendor.
But the more she thought about it -- brainstorming the many scenarios and wheels within wheels -- the more she believed the character of this phantom French person should be expanded in case of probing questions during the cross-examination. In this way Jules was born...
His full name is Jules Claude Moulin. He is 5'10" with curly auburn hair and green eyes. He wears contact lenses and has one front tooth expertly capped as a result of tripping on a cobble stone at the age of 12 during a visit to Rheims with his family.
His father is named Henri Claude Moulin and his mother, Yvonne Marie -- with the maiden name DuArtie. She had her tits "done" in the 70's. . .pretty good work for that era, although a tad too firm.
During a holiday trip to Spain in the 1990's, both of his parents were killed in the explosion of a bomb planted by Basque Separatists. The Bomb was built by Stephan Catillia and left in a bag beside a Post Office by Carlos Sanchez. Afterwards Sanchez agonized over the bombing because he'd slipped the phone number of a really hot chick he met that day in the bag without thinking and it was blown to bits... (see Part 2)
However, Ginny's imaginary friend WAS remarkable because she was 21 and in second year at Cornell Law when Jules first made his appearance.
[Author's Note: Truthfully, it's unfair to juxtapose the first silly discussion of the proverbial "Imaginary Friend" of childhood with the second unrelated discussion of an identity Ginny allegedly made up. The first discussion segues expertly into the second as if they are related, and by this association, the absurd flavor of the first permeates the second, adding to it an unwarranted taste of the ridiculous. Probably there is a scholarly lawyer term that I don't know for such tricks of rhetoric.
In fact, the entire exercise is a skillful ploy to be funny. Probably there is also a scholarly comedic term that I don't know for such tricks of humor.
Yet cleverly twisting or better still, completely fabricating the truth is my way. And like the guy said in that 'Dangerous Liaisons' movie, "It's beyond my control" anyways...]
Jules grew from a discussion Ginny had with a particular friend (who's identity is irrelevant, especially if it was me) concerning that person's desire to know Gin's father's opinion of certain Wall Street investments. Everyone knows that Mr. Mullins, though staunchly recalcitrant, is a Certified Genius with the Midas touch -- like Lex Luthor.
As anyone with casual knowledge of Sherlock Holmes, M. Poirot or Nero Wolfe knows, one must be circumspect when dealing with geniuses because they quickly deduce everything from one or two facts and wind up knowing all your business, even what happened in the elevator. (I know this for a fact, as I do it all the time myself.) So Gin was wary of just coming out and asking her father's opinion on anything since one could fill a large Japanese trawler with tuna using all the cans of worms it opens. Besides what's the point of studying law if one's going to approach things in a simple, direct and open manner; that's the way engineers do things.
Sitting there with her friend, mulling over the request, Gin figured she could start by asking her father if he thinks a person... without naming names... should put money into Google now that it's pulled back some or if it's better to wait because it's going to drop even more. Then under the inevitable pressure of his interrogation -- at such times being prepared and not blinking are paramount -- she could drop a name. . .Jules. . . which just popped into her head, as random names often do.
Working through the scenarios she figured the next time her dad called -- for whatever, maybe to ask if she had the 24K service done on the Beemer -- she'ld open with something along the lines of, "No I didn't get it serviced because the dudes at the dealership undress me with their eyes. By the way. . .Google has dropped quite a bit lately. Do you think it will recover and if so, is this the low or will it drop more before jumping back up."
He might say, "Well, with the skimpy skirts you wear I can't imagine it takes much for anyone's eyes to remove them. But surely you aren't interested in investments. . .why are you asking?"
Artfully controlling the conversation, she replies "Ah well... Yes I am interested but actually I was going by Starbuck's where I ran into my friend..."
He interjects, "OHMYGOD WITH YOUR CAR!!"
She continues, "NO, NOT with my car! ...My old friend, Jules, an exchange student from France that I know (whom, for those already lost in the intrigue, she made up), and he was talking about Google and it got me interested, what with it's spectacular rise and fall. And anyways, I can't just be a pretty face and sweet smile my whole life (...as her adoring father, he ignores rather than concedes this point)."
Undoubtedly he would respond, "Is this Jules a boyfriend?"
And she shrewdly moves her next chess piece, "Oh No... no way. He's homosexual." In his mind this changes Jules from being a person that he might actually have to meet someday to a theoretical entity. . . the kind of young dude a daughter's father can really like.
At this point Ginny assured her friend she just needs to sit back and take copious notes as her dad waxes expansively on his profound understanding of Google's potentiality.
Then she would add, "And you know, the girl behind the counter at Starbuck's, who by the way must weigh at least 300 lbs., was talking about the New York Stock Exchange IPO... Is that something to jump on now? Because when she mentioned it, a guy behind the counter, I think his name was Seth, said that the Chicago Mercantile Exchange went public a few years ago and it's stock has soared 3 or 4 times in the last year or two."
And again he would expound, up and down, about these investments. In closing he might even let slip the prospective release date for "Doom 4." It was a most cunning plan -- a piece of cake or as Brits say, Robert's your father's brother. Ginny beamed in all her sagacious splendor.
But the more she thought about it -- brainstorming the many scenarios and wheels within wheels -- the more she believed the character of this phantom French person should be expanded in case of probing questions during the cross-examination. In this way Jules was born...
His full name is Jules Claude Moulin. He is 5'10" with curly auburn hair and green eyes. He wears contact lenses and has one front tooth expertly capped as a result of tripping on a cobble stone at the age of 12 during a visit to Rheims with his family.
His father is named Henri Claude Moulin and his mother, Yvonne Marie -- with the maiden name DuArtie. She had her tits "done" in the 70's. . .pretty good work for that era, although a tad too firm.
During a holiday trip to Spain in the 1990's, both of his parents were killed in the explosion of a bomb planted by Basque Separatists. The Bomb was built by Stephan Catillia and left in a bag beside a Post Office by Carlos Sanchez. Afterwards Sanchez agonized over the bombing because he'd slipped the phone number of a really hot chick he met that day in the bag without thinking and it was blown to bits... (see Part 2)
To Be Continued
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