The History of Gin
or
A Fox's Tail
Is Life Existential? You Decide.
by ' Colorado ' Gumi
...I n s p i r e d By T r u e E v e n t s...
Chapter 9
De Amazon Ain't Just a River in Brazil
Part III - "Don't Let The Sun Go Down On Me"
(see Part 2)...Ginger revived beside the Blonde's body. The Amazons had carried their three fatalities from the fortress and placed them side-by-side at a shady turn of the creek. The wizard, who had laid Ginny next to her friend, now urged her to hurry and catch the others, who were quickly ascending the trail back to their horses -- he had other business to which he must fly. Put off by the Amazons' abandonment of their sisters, Gin had no wish to leave but the wizard assured her this was their way and she did as asked. Looking back through wet eyes she noticed the women had washed the bodies, wrapped each up to the chin in a sheet of their silken fabric and placed a cushion under each head.
The Amazons returned to their peaceful valley (not a soul tried running), struck camp and traveled the long way round back to the battleground. One reason for their assault concerned what the half-men kept in the fortress, which the wizard took care of. Another reason was that it commanded the road through this valley and the Amazons intended to travel to the rich towns upstream, spreading news of their liberation and recruiting a cohort of Amazons to garrison the fort. Again approaching the empty fortress the company passed the three bodies, still there in the shade. Ginny, in a pit of depression, rode close by but was discouraged from stopping. A ways up the road the first town, which had endured rough treatment from the brutes, erupted into celebration at the news. The inhabitants were just like Hobbits, if you can believe it, so there was no trouble between the resident males and the Amazons, who were welcomed heartily and quartered in the finest public house.
Surrounded by a drunken celebration in the pub's dining hall, Ginny was crying quietly in her beer, though the drink tasted more like alcohol infused coffee. She was jostled several times in the wild exuberance, but at one point someone started poking her hard in the ribs repeatedly. Figuring it was one of the munchkin hobbit-men prodding with his stubby finger, Ginny whirled round to give him a genuine New York City brush off when she saw the gold hair, provocative eyes, happy grin and near-naked body of the blonde Amazon. Turns out, the wizard could not negate the wounds of one too far from his aura but he could prevent the death. The seemingly dead women merely needed time to absorb their wounds and, with his help, restore their life energy. The other Amazons knew this but in their ignorance of what her grief was, didn't bother communicating it to Gin. The wizard didn't mention it because he enjoyed being perverse. Still, he had placed Ginny beside her companion because he sensed the extraordinary bond between the two and knew Ginny's proximity would speed the healing process so he wasn't a complete jerk about it.
Reunited with the Blonde, Ginny now joined the celebration by getting very drunk very fast, a particular talent of hers. With her head engulfed in a pleasant buzz, she grew reflective; first wondering whether she had walked into an extended episode of "Xena: Warrior Princess", and then pondering the irony of finding a comforting friend (no easy thing in her old world) in this strange new world she'd dropped into. Feeling the call of nature in the urgent way women do, she excused herself and headed for the privy. Touching the collar still round her neck, she could not deny the depth of her bond with the blonde Amazon and resolved to spill her soul to the woman in a most forthright manner. Smiling, Ginny remembered that old catchline "Denial ain't just a river in Egypt" as she pushed past the curtains serving as a door in this place and stepped into...
...a brightly lit Starbuck's restroom complete with gleaming toilet, sink, mirror and towel dispenser -- no woolly mammoth-like thingies, no expansive plain. Looking back the way she'd come, she saw only a closed Starbuck's restroom door. Looking forward she saw herself in the mirror, bare-chested and somewhat smudged, with a leafy twig knotted in her hair. Cursing fluently and lamenting her exit from that fantastic world -- better than multiple weeks spent last year in Cancun, London and some Caribbean island where a cellphone call cost $3.75 a minute -- Ginny broke down before the mirror and cried a river at the loss.
Why women follow each other to the restroom is unfathomable. My own theory is that deep in their brainstems women, as members of a competitive and predacious species, view all other women as rivals. Women instinctively accompany other women to restrooms with the subconscious intent of violently reducing the competition when it's most vulnerable. However after eons of socialization, women no longer have the conscious ability to strike once in position, so instead they gossip, preen and listen to each other pee. Or perhaps they just go there in packs to smell one another. Regardless, Ginny was in the midst of a heartwrenching sob when she heard a scrabble at the door, looked up in the mirror and saw the Blonde materialize through it.
They both smiled broadly. With a knowing hand, the gentle Amazon reached forward and smoothed the tangles from Ginny's chestnut hair...
Fin - Chapter 9
The Amazons returned to their peaceful valley (not a soul tried running), struck camp and traveled the long way round back to the battleground. One reason for their assault concerned what the half-men kept in the fortress, which the wizard took care of. Another reason was that it commanded the road through this valley and the Amazons intended to travel to the rich towns upstream, spreading news of their liberation and recruiting a cohort of Amazons to garrison the fort. Again approaching the empty fortress the company passed the three bodies, still there in the shade. Ginny, in a pit of depression, rode close by but was discouraged from stopping. A ways up the road the first town, which had endured rough treatment from the brutes, erupted into celebration at the news. The inhabitants were just like Hobbits, if you can believe it, so there was no trouble between the resident males and the Amazons, who were welcomed heartily and quartered in the finest public house.
Surrounded by a drunken celebration in the pub's dining hall, Ginny was crying quietly in her beer, though the drink tasted more like alcohol infused coffee. She was jostled several times in the wild exuberance, but at one point someone started poking her hard in the ribs repeatedly. Figuring it was one of the munchkin hobbit-men prodding with his stubby finger, Ginny whirled round to give him a genuine New York City brush off when she saw the gold hair, provocative eyes, happy grin and near-naked body of the blonde Amazon. Turns out, the wizard could not negate the wounds of one too far from his aura but he could prevent the death. The seemingly dead women merely needed time to absorb their wounds and, with his help, restore their life energy. The other Amazons knew this but in their ignorance of what her grief was, didn't bother communicating it to Gin. The wizard didn't mention it because he enjoyed being perverse. Still, he had placed Ginny beside her companion because he sensed the extraordinary bond between the two and knew Ginny's proximity would speed the healing process so he wasn't a complete jerk about it.
Reunited with the Blonde, Ginny now joined the celebration by getting very drunk very fast, a particular talent of hers. With her head engulfed in a pleasant buzz, she grew reflective; first wondering whether she had walked into an extended episode of "Xena: Warrior Princess", and then pondering the irony of finding a comforting friend (no easy thing in her old world) in this strange new world she'd dropped into. Feeling the call of nature in the urgent way women do, she excused herself and headed for the privy. Touching the collar still round her neck, she could not deny the depth of her bond with the blonde Amazon and resolved to spill her soul to the woman in a most forthright manner. Smiling, Ginny remembered that old catchline "Denial ain't just a river in Egypt" as she pushed past the curtains serving as a door in this place and stepped into...
...a brightly lit Starbuck's restroom complete with gleaming toilet, sink, mirror and towel dispenser -- no woolly mammoth-like thingies, no expansive plain. Looking back the way she'd come, she saw only a closed Starbuck's restroom door. Looking forward she saw herself in the mirror, bare-chested and somewhat smudged, with a leafy twig knotted in her hair. Cursing fluently and lamenting her exit from that fantastic world -- better than multiple weeks spent last year in Cancun, London and some Caribbean island where a cellphone call cost $3.75 a minute -- Ginny broke down before the mirror and cried a river at the loss.
Why women follow each other to the restroom is unfathomable. My own theory is that deep in their brainstems women, as members of a competitive and predacious species, view all other women as rivals. Women instinctively accompany other women to restrooms with the subconscious intent of violently reducing the competition when it's most vulnerable. However after eons of socialization, women no longer have the conscious ability to strike once in position, so instead they gossip, preen and listen to each other pee. Or perhaps they just go there in packs to smell one another. Regardless, Ginny was in the midst of a heartwrenching sob when she heard a scrabble at the door, looked up in the mirror and saw the Blonde materialize through it.
They both smiled broadly. With a knowing hand, the gentle Amazon reached forward and smoothed the tangles from Ginny's chestnut hair...
Fin - Chapter 9
To Be Continued
